I’ve often found it very difficult to commit to a decision, especially if it means I might have to let go of one of my options. Liking to keep my options open, or have options is a good back up.
Recently I have found it empowering to commit to a job as a permanent employee. After a few months I cancelled my other working commitments with temporary jobs.
Some people at work, say they can’t decide to commit or stay on a temporary basis.
I’ve really enjoyed my temping work over the years, its great for variety.
I’m appreciating the chance to go deeper, with my relationships at work, to understand each other better.
Committing to a permanent job is turning out to be a good experience, and a tough one, because you can’t just leave when it’s not your best day.
It’s good to commit to things, have you done a college course, or made a big decision like where to live or a change you went through? Feel free to put something in the comments, if you want to commit to it!
Where does all the pressure to perform come from as women?
Pressure to have good skin
Pressure to be in control of our weight
Pressure to have the right clothes, not second hand ones
Pressure to have settled with the right man, or partner
Pressure to work in the field with good earnings
Who does the pressure come from?
Advertisements selling us clothes, cosmetics
Other people feeling pressured, and then wanting to fit in with them
Of course, we all can agree that facemarks were needed, and necessary without doubt to prevent the spread of covid.
Having now spent 3 years working as a carer for adults, I have started to feel a sense of shame or guilt about my full face. Seeing someone bare their face, feels somehow offensive. My mind draws the rest of the face and I often imagine the face to be different from the one which is behind it. And did you know, our brains erase our noses, as in reality we can always see them.
I was looking back at the first lockdown videos, as YouTube congratulated me on 100 subscribers. This early TikTok video is one of the last memories I have, of feeling normal about faces.
The constant compulsory mask wearing, has disoriented my spacial awareness of faces, and even how to move mine. I find myself less sure of myself as I speak to my colleagues on the bus stop without our masks. But fortunately it only takes a smile to break the ice.
Saying good bye to the freedom to wear your face as it is. Three years on, does anyone else have similar feelings of dysphoria or shame and guilt about showing your face without covering your mouth or nose and mouth?