Tag Archives: Guitar

Reselling clothes to delete, erase and remove unwanted memories

The film Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, was influential when I grew up. I was in early adulthood. You can see the attraction of wanting to edit out and wipe over sources of disappointment and pain. Our lives do fall short of our expectations, or hopes. And sometimes we had placed too much expectation on one of our relationships, or a group of people.

I’ve found reselling items a powerful way to find closure about upsetting or inconclusive memories. And including relationships where there wasn’t a way to say goodbye either.

Reselling helps to remove the items which may trigger a memory which you are wanting to experience less often. Packaging up the item of sentiment, and folding over it with the closure of the parcel then putting it into a postbox. It’s all a metaphor in real life, for letting go of the person or grievance.

We feel resistance to letting go

I’m sure I hold onto more belongings than I should. One significant moment was selling my guitars from my early adulthood. They signified very positive emotions and experiences. Sometimes I think I shouldn’t have sold them. My dad was disappointed. I used the money to purchase a laptop, because in lockdowns I wanted to improve my IT skills.

One person brought a guitar and collected it after driving all the way from Liverpool. Coincidently Liverpool is the last place I truly felt creative with my instrument, as that’s where I went to uni.

The other guitar was brought to be a present for someone’s nephew. There was a sense that someone fresh, younger may find new enjoyment in it.

Letting go mistakes

I wouldn’t tell everyone to sell items which they treasure, if you don’t feel sure over time that you want to sell it, please don’t. Sometimes you are happy to see how you might feel without the items and its sentimental energy. And sometimes there are people who will sell you a sob story to make you feel you should sell your valued item for less.

Rejection and memories of times with low confidence

Items associated with a time when you had low confidence or experienced a vivid rejection, can be helpful to resell. Or you can tidy them away out of sight using storage solutions like zip up coverings for clothes, to keep them safe.

If and when you hear from the new owner of the item, about their positive feelings with the product, then you have created a new memory, a new connection about the object with unwanted emotions attached. And you can start to think of the disappointment or sentimental memory being somehow shared with a new owner, who will help take care of it for you.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0338013/ – The link to Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind on IMDB,

‘When their relationship turns sour, a couple undergoes a medical procedure to have each other erased from their memories.’

The concept of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Reselling sentimental items, a much safer way to make peace with unwanted thoughts and disappointments.

Beth’s trailer camper van club and music

I did once or twice create my own music, during my teens…. we had great bands like Coldplay releasing their early albums and it certainly was a lovely hobby, which helped me not to get bullied in secondary school and college.

Beth Orton’s track was so mesmerising for me and the video is pure simplicity.

Beth is sort of anxious, and curious … all at the same time, and contented in a very simplistically shot video.

She gazes out from her trailer house and then also towards the camera. Thank god for musician’s who weren’t smeared with thick make up like Little Mix or Katy Perry.

I think music is an excellent medicine for the soul. And I am slightly anti-vax towards some of the mental health meds me and my peers had to take whilst we were on recovery plans with the UK health services.

There’s a new trend towards therapeutic use of haullagenics in America with places like Compass Pathways offering treatment as close to the UK as Ireland.

The thing I realise is easy – can be taking drugs for relief of symptoms of poor mental health. The more difficult thing can be finding enough strategies to be able to pull yourself out of the depression, or anxiety.

My family always maintain my ten years on medications were a help to me. I’d tell anyone to add an extra 5 years getting used to not being on them after you start a course of treatment.

Perhaps as patients we should be more empowered to choose our medications, and if I want to go to Goop HQ and try magic mushrooms with Gwyneth whilst under the supervisor of a therapeutic clinician, why can’t I have what I really want??!!

I’ll leave you with a prescription for Jagged Little Pill by Alanis Morrisette. xxx